Blame Yourself First; Change Your Perception First

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“The first difference between the philosopher and the uneducated man is that the latter says, ‘Woe is me for my child, for my brother, woe is me for my father’, and the other, if he is compelled to speak, considers the matter and says, Woe is me for myself.’ For nothing outside the will can hinder or harm the will; it can only harm itself. If then we accept this, and, when things go amiss, are inclined to blame ourselves, remembering that judgement alone can disturb our peace and constancy, I swear to you by all the gods that we have made progress.”  Epictetus Discourses Book 3, Chapter 19

In this excerpt, Epictetus reemphasizes that our impressions Continue reading

I Finally Found My Son…Alive!

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I was planning to visit my son at college.  He knew I was going to see him Thursday.  My wife had sent him a text on Monday, telling him that we would be making the 3-hour drive to have lunch with him.  He responded with his typical concise “ok.”  We were very busy until Wednesday night, but my wife sent a text around 6 pm, “We are coming for lunch tomorrow.”  He did not respond.  No big deal, this is typical of my atypical son who does not check texts very often, and seems to reply even less.  At 10:30 pm the night before our trip, I sent a text to him…no response.  Again, this is typical, he was probably working and couldn’t check it.  As we departed for his college Thursday morning, I sent a new text, “We are coming for lunch today.”  I did not receive a reply. Continue reading