“True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing. The greatest blessings of mankind are within us and within our reach. A wise man is content with his lot, whatever it may be, without wishing for what he has not.” –Seneca
I just want to be free. I want to be free to do whatever I want, wake up when I want, eat what I want. As long as I do not actively harm those around me, I should be able to choose the path to take without someone else’s interference. I want to keep the fruits of my labor, and to share or trade with my property as I please, in ways that I find most effective. I maintain that this is the supreme state for the individual.
We all want this, we all want freedom, no?. To do whatever we want, whenever we want. However, is this really freedom? Will this really bring happiness? Does living in a world without rules really bring happiness? Isn’t it better to live in a well-regulated environment? Well, as is frequently the case, I think the answer is “it depends.” It depends on the source of a person’s structure, internal or external. Where does your structure, your regulation come from? Is it an external or internal source?
With any structure there is great freedom. A prisoner is relieved of many burdens when his schedule is laid out for him. 0630 Wake Up, 0700 Eat, 0730 shower, 2200 lights out, etc. No weapons, no cell phones, 1 phone call per day…follow the rules. You must wear the orange suit…follow the rules. The prisoner is relieved of the burden of responsibility through a highly structured environment. His structure was decided by someone else: the prisoner is not really free, is he? A child has great freedom because she does not have to worry about what rules are correct, and which rules are not. All the child has to do is follow the rules, and she is relieved of the burden of judgment. When she is given a template to follow, and follows it then the results are fairly predictable. There is freedom in structure, but is this really freedom?
The prisoner is “free” of many burdens, but not really free.
The inevitable question to ask myself is, “Do I want to be a child or a prisoner forever?” In other words, do I want someone else to make the rules for me, or can I discover my own structure? Where would I find this structure? I will propose that you can have freedom from an outside influence and structure…as long as you maintain your philosophy.
Through philosophy, in my case a Stoic one, I can regulate myself. In essence, I can self-govern. In regulation, there is freedom. In self-regulation, there is transcendence, maturity, and happiness…you become a fully virtuous human being. When you let someone else govern you, it feels safe and secure, but you won’t be happy and you are not truly virtuous. To be truly happy, you must self-govern.
So, to summarize:
“Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind.” –Kansas
“We are the champions my friend, and we’ll keep on fighting til the end!” –Queen
Fate and impermanence are powerful concepts. I’ve dwelled upon them in my previous posts…just about all of them, in fact. You can find examples of this here, here, and here. If I am destined for failure, doomed to death, and my world will eventually crumble before me, what’s the point? Should I just throw in the towel? If we are all destined for misery, then why should I even try?
Should I just give up?
No, no, no! That is not my point! It is true that much struggle, much strife will befall us. It is also true that your existence, as well as that of all around you will be gone in no time. Face it, in about 100 years it will all be new people. 100 years…that’s a blink of an eye in the continuum of the 13.7 billion (or so) the universe has existed. For comparison, think of the age of the universe as a year. If you live to be 100 years, your life span would be less than second in that year (actually, about 0.23 seconds). So if our time is so short, then what does that mean? What is it you want to do with those 100 years…with that blink of your existence? How can I be a hero? Here are some suggestions:
13.7 Billion Years!
Master Brain Surgery!
It may take years, it may take much of your time, but find something you love and master it! It will make you proud, it will be worth it.
Listen!
You will notice more if you really pay attention. Remember, you only have 100 years so use every moment wisely.
No need to try them all, although you could in a 100 years, but maybe just try a few. So, even though fate will have its way with you, you can take it on with tenacity. You can be a hero if you put yourself to it.
…and you can be proud of it, because YOU made the effort!
“Men seek retreats for themselves, houses in the country, sea-shores, and mountains; and thou too art wont to desire such things very much. But this is altogether a mark of the most common sort of men, for it is in thy power whenever thou shalt choose to retire into thyself. For nowhere either with more quiet or more freedom from trouble does a man retire than into his own soul, particularly when he has within him such thoughts that by looking into them he is immediately in perfect tranquility.”–Marcus Aurelius
People spend a lot of money and time so they can get away on splendid vacations. They dream of places like Hawaii, Bermuda, St. Thomas, or maybe a get-away to Europe or Disney World! Why do they do this? I think everybody needs a little time to recharge the batteries, to gain a little clarity or put it all into perspective. Also, I think that the stories we collect from our “get-aways” can last us a lifetime.
For the most part, though, all of the benefit of a vacation is available to you right now. All you have to do is accept that it is all a game. It is all impermanent. Why are you chasing what you are chasing? To have luxury? So your kids will have riches or security? Will it help them? You might be unemployed, so you are stressed about that. You might have absolutely nothing. Most of you reading this have at least some level of subsistence, though. If you are reading this, at least you are alive, which is something for sure. Even those with some major struggles, have a little time for a vacation, even one for 5 minutes.
You can get away right now. Retire in your mind, and be grateful for all you have…for your life, your surviving family, the meal you will eat today. Take a nap, watch a show, read a book, watch a TV movie with the family. If only for a few minutes you can get away. Maybe simply to reflect on what is virtuous, or on the impermanence of existence.
Is this guy on a Staycation? (photo by Kimberly Vohsen)
As for vacation stories, your everyday life is full of them. Especially the small misfortune stories! These are the blessings. Like the time you backed into a pole, or your wife hit the side of the garage. What about the morning you put your shirt on inside-out or backwards? Yesterday, my daughter came down dressed in green-striped pants, with a pink and yellow checkered shirt. Now that’s a story! I collect vacations five minutes at a time.
I don’t think I could pull this look off.
In the end, you will be gone. Don’t let this frighten you, just know that what you are after, what you are stressing over might not be that important. Even if it is, you can take a break from it.
You can take your “Staycation.”
I must die. But must I die groaning? I must be imprisoned. But must I whine as well? I must suffer exile. Can any one then hinder me from going with a smile, and a good courage, and at peace?—Epictetus